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Pedalpalooza, June 19th

June 19, 2010 12:11 am

by Lauren Hudgins

F*&#ING WHIMSICAL REGRETSY RIDE
Anna Banana’s, 1214 NW 21st Ave
10:00am
Regretsy themed attire encouraged. Whimsical f*#kery required dress up your bike or you with some regrettable craftyness. What’s Regretsy? 10am meet up Anna Bannanas. Head to a mystery crafty destination. Afterward, we will leave for Powell’s to the Regretsy talk/book signing with April Winchell. Post-Signing optional destination 4ish?- Museum Of Contemporary Craft (3.00 admission) Bring money for anything you may buy, drink, handmade stuff at mystery destination. “Special prize” for best skants.

GAYEST DAY OF THE YEAR RIDE
Garlington Center/SMYRC parking lot, 3024 NE MLK BLVD
12:00pm
Join us for a bike ride and fundraiser open to ALL for the local non-profit program SMYRC, Sexual & Gender Minority Youth Resource Center. SMYRC provides a safe, supervised, harassment-free, and sober drop in center for sexual and gender minority youth in Portland, Oregon. Donations suggested in advance at SMRYC online or bring a check to the event.

BICYCLISTS OF COLOR PDX BIKE RIDE
Rose Quarter Transit Center, NE Wheeler Ave and Holladay St
2:00pm – 6:00pm
Yay! our first Bicyclist of Color PDX ride! I think we’ll meet at the Rose Quarter and from there ride down the Spring Water Corridor. It’s easy, flat and very scenic. Picnic at Sellwood Park after wards? Bicyclists of Color PDX is a multicultural bicycle club out of Portland Community College. We promote and encourage people of color to saddle up and ride to promote sustainability and healthy living. We go on very mild well paced rides and take lots of breaks.

WORLD NAKED BIKE RIDE
WNBR HQ, SE Salmon St and Water Ave
(C’mon in! No drinking on the street.)
9:00pm – 11:30pm, Ride at 10.
Join us in the largest naked ride in North America, and quite possibly the world, as we gently protest against the fossil fuel dependence, and show the world a better, funner way. See www.worldnakedbikeride.org for more propaganda. The dress code is officially “as bare as you dare”. Many changes this year, so read the “Your First Naked Ride” page even if you’ve done this before. Also see here for the countdown.

Editors note: If you are not attending the ride but just “spectating”… First of all, why are you just spectating? If you must be one of the sideline gawkers, remember the “look but don’t touch” rule. Watch the riders go by, but be nice to their bare asses! Do not take pictures without permission. Do not accost them. Absolutely do not touch them or prevent their movement. Don’t be a jerk. They are naked for fun, not to attract sexual harassment.

Full Schedule Here.

This Looks Like a Job For a Computer Nerd!

March 8, 2010 3:25 pm

by Lauren Hudgins

My friend’s company, ShopIgniter, just got a bunch of venture capital and is looking to hire. My friend would be your immediate boss, so I promise your boss would be awesome.

Interface Engineer

ShopIgniter seeks a full-time, front-end web developer with a solid understanding of standards-compliant (X)HTML/CSS with the ability to quickly slice up and implement designs created in Photoshop or Illustrator. General knowledge of Adobe software is a must. Experience working with dynamically-driven content and manipulating the DOM with jQuery or javascript is a plus. An eye for aesthetics and design is appreciated.

You Will:

* Perform your tasks quickly and efficiently, meeting all deadlines in a fast-paced work environment.
* Cross-browser test your code, support IE6.
* Accurately translate beautiful designs to the web, with pixel-perfect precision.
* Posses 4+ years of experience hand-coding websites.
* Be comfortable working on a Mac.
* Understand modern font/image replacement techniques.

You Won’t:

* Ever use the words WYSIWYG or Comic Sans in a positive way.
* Code a site without giving consideration to text-resizing and other accessibility issues.
* Use tables to layout anything other than tabular data.
* Use a single unnecessary div, span, class, id… you get the idea.

ShopIgniter, a start-up located in Portland, OR, provides a next generation ecommerce platform for physical retail, branded website and social channels. Local candidates only, no recruiters please.

Interested applicants should send email, cover letter, and résumé to jasonATshopigniterDOTcom.

Suitcase Sam

January 17, 2010 3:04 pm

by Lauren Hudgins

I’m constantly trolling craiglist for modeling and acting gigs. Most of them aren’t paid of course. I understand that sometimes there are mutually beneficial circumstances when you can trade your time for somebody else’s time. But I can find those delightful unpaid opportunities without the help of craigslist. Thanks. (And especially do not ever expect me to take my clothes off in front of a camera without paying me.) Don’t tell me that I’m going to get experience, exposure, or whatever. I won’t. If you’re out of high school you shouldn’t be naïve enough to believe that this will be a magical success that will bring all of us fame and glory.

But this guy is still in high school and his project sounds hilarious.

Casting for ‘Suitcase Sam’ (NE Portland)
Date: 2010-01-17, 2:15PM PST
Reply to: gigs-ac7kk-1557322824@craigslist.org

I am a senior in highschool and am now casting for my independent film called ‘Suitcase Sam’ which I plan to get to the film festival circuit. Please send headshot/resume, or if you don’t have any experience, just tell me a little about yourself and send a photo, and clarify which role you wish to maintain.

ROLES:

STAN-30′s. Tech-savy, has a past with the mafia.

* Location: NE Portland
* it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
* Compensation: no pay

PostingID: 1557322824

http://portland.craigslist.org/mlt/tlg/1557322824.html

Aw. Good luck, plucky student.

Billgoblin

January 12, 2010 6:55 pm

by Lauren Hudgins

I’m in love, love, love with the blog Regretsy: the blog making fun of everybody’s right to free expression and to sell their crappy art on the internet (Etsy).

Occasionally, a featured artist will have talent (or a sense of humor), but just produced something mindbogglingly peculiar.

Today, Regretsy highlighted Portland artist John Larriva and his terrifying windup toy with the head of Bill Nighy.

As is common with Regretsy art, the horrid handcraft sold very quickly.

The Santaland Diaries at PCS.

December 12, 2009 3:58 pm

by Brigid Marz

On Christmas Eve last year, I found myself squeezing superglue onto an old man’s tooth, in an empty storefront at the local mall. The man, of course, was Mr. Santa Claus himself. He had lost the tooth in a frenzy of holiday spirit, to the sharp elbows of a 2-year-old girl. Santa spit his tooth into the palm of his white-gloved hand, and beckoned me, his favourite elf, to assist him in the back room.

It wasn’t until the superglue came out of the tube that I realized it was black. To all those parents who had to explain Santa’s tooth rot to their toddlers, I am sorry. The season must go on. For the rest of you – the ones laughing at my misfortune – have I got a show for you….

Humorist David Sedaris is probably best known for his collections of stories and essays, including the Thurber Prize winning Me Talk Pretty One Day, and for his frequent readings on NPR’s This American Life. I met him years ago at a Halloween event. A small, shy man with a bashful voice, he drew a witch’s broom on the inside cover of my book. It looked more like a showerhead.

The Santaland Diaries may be Sedaris’ best-known work; it was certainly his break-out hit. A long-form essay describing his experience as an elf at the Mecca of Christian Consumerism, The Santaland Diaries is apalling, sardonic, bitter and funny.

The Portland Center Stage studio production of Joe Mantello’s stage adaptation enlivens the essay through an energetic one-man performance.

You may recall the talented Wade McCollum from his acrobatic performance in PCS’s Batboy: the Musical. Charming, expressive and dynamic, McCollum is a strong vocalist. His strong performance evokes characters not only of narrator, Crumpet the Elf, but of the whole holiday city in the depths of Macy’s department store, from his fellow elves, to enthusiastically vomiting children, to Billie Holiday herself.

Actor/singer/playwright/songwriter McCollum delivers a full-body performance with enough depth to make you forget you are attending a one-man show. He takes a responsive approach, engaging the front rows in light banter, allowing the audience to take ownership of the show.

McCollum’s de facto co-stars are the lighting and sound designs by Don Crossley, and by Sarah Picket and Casi Pacilio. The talented production team have created a multimedia dialog with sensory commentary. The result is a rich, complete production that is understated yet fully realized.

Director Wendy Knox describes the production as “scathingly honest.” Even to the most un-cheery patrons, I would recommend the small black-box production, solely for the five-minute foray into Satanland. The production is biting but light, and certain to evoke a laugh or twelve.

Now through January 2nd at Portland Center Stage.
Show up early. Seating is by general admission.

Cake Wrecks

September 23, 2009 1:59 pm

by Lauren Hudgins

I’m very much into blogs showcasing the essence of FAIL! Obviously there’s FAILblog. I also like Awkward Family Photos, Sorry I Missed Your Party, and Cake Wrecks (for professional cake decorating failures).

Cake Wrecks has just put out a new book showcasing the best of the worst cakes from around the world. The blogger will be appearing at the downtown Powell’s this Friday to show off the publication and to share some cake with us.

Powell’s Books
1005 W Burnside
Portland, OR 97209 US
Friday, September 25, 7:30PM

Get your Geek on at the… Hilton?

August 30, 2009 9:28 pm

by Tina Armstrong

As Labor Day approaches, you may be finding yourself with some free time on your hands. What better way to fill it than with a trip to the ritzy downtown hotel for a weekend of bizarrely dressed, and sometimes scantily clad, anime (Japanese animation) fanatics at Kumoricon?

Kumoricon08

Weeaboos, gamers, and geeks collide at this three day event at the Hilton on SW 6th and Salmon St. for the Labor Day weekend. Live chess, anime screenings, a miniskirt army, a cosplay (essentially costume role play) swimsuit competition, karaoke, writing and art workshops, an enormous exhibitors hall, an art auction benefiting the local organization p:ear, video and card games, sake tasting for the over-21 crowd, and even a Chibiroom for the youngsters are only a few of the distractions offered at Kumoricon. Check out the complete list of activities and events HERE!

Popular guests such as Kirk Thornton and Last Stop Tokyo, a masquerade, concerts, maid service, and random bouts of swordplay on the street generously help the effort to keep bringing Kumoricon back- in this year’s case, for the seventh year in a row. Kumoricon is expecting over 5000 attendees this year, a fair percentage of whom arrive incognito as characters of fictional series- everything from Cowboy Bebop and Pokemon to Harry Potter and Star Wars. Fun and family friendly, it’s one of the countless events that Keeps Portland Weird.

Kumoricon08

If any of those activities captured your attention, give it a shot. However, don’t be deterred by the young crowd. Bring a friend, have a laugh, enjoy the view, and, if you’re a “noob” to the anime scene, experience something new and potentially psychologically scarring! Oh, and one more thing: do not forget your camera. If you’re ever the daredevil, throw on that ol’ pirate shirt and boots… you’ll stand out more dressed in jeans and a t-shirt.

For schedule and registration details, check out the Kumoricon homepage.

Oh, XKCD, how right you are.

August 14, 2009 4:59 pm

by Lauren Hudgins

http://xkcd.com/623/

Pedalpalooza Starts This Week

June 9, 2009 5:12 pm

by Lauren Hudgins

Pedalpalooza

Portland’s 2+ week celebration of bike fun starts this Thursday, June 11th. By Saturday the festival will be in full swing with the Portland portion of the World Naked Bike Ride. It’s exactly what it sounds like. The theme this year is “Where the Wild Things Are.”

My favorite event last year was the Prince Vs. Bowie Dance Party. Wear sparkly glam costumes. Bike. Drink. Dance. Bike. Drink. Dance. For as long as you can take. The event is repeating this year on Friday, June 19th.

For sweet teeth we have…
The Chocolate Ride
Vegan Baked Goods Ride
The Ice Cream Social

For Zombie lovers we have…
Jesus Cycle Procession
Greatfully Dead (sorta)
Zombie Cycle Outbreak

A sampling for activists…
~~Guerrilla Traffic Calming~~CANCELED
~~Homeless Hotspots~~ CANCELED
Ride Against the CRC
Bike Advocacy 101

And there’s stuff for the drunks, the pervs, the gluttons, the nerds, the exhibitionists, the snobs. And yes there is something for you, even if you are new to this whole bike thing. Check out the full Pedalpalooza Schedule.

Dirty Limericks About Washington Towns

March 30, 2009 6:32 pm

by Lauren Hudgins

“The only thing sillier than sex is the names of towns in Washington.” -Jonathan

So it’s not about Portland, or even about Oregon, but it’s written by a Portlander. There is a blog for everything out there, and yes, there is a blog for original limericks based on Washington town names. Bonus! Each limerick comes with a little history lesson about the town.